How to be a fan of problematic things

Social Justice League:

I like things, and some of those things are problematic. I like Lord of the Rings even though it’s pretty fucked up with regard to women and race (any narrative that says “this whole race is evil” is fucked up, okay). I like A Song of Ice and Fire even though its portrayal of people of colour is problematic, and often I find that its in-text condemnation of patriarchy isn’t obvious enough to justify the sexism displayed. I like the movie Scott Pilgrim vs The World even though it is racist in its portrayal of Matthew Patel, panders to stereotypes in its portrayal of Wallace, and trivialises queer female sexuality in its portrayal of Ramona and Roxy’s relationship. For fuck’s sake, Ramona even says “It was a phase”! How much more cliche and offensive could this movie be? Oh wait, remember how Scott defeats Roxy, his only female adversary, by making her orgasm? Excuse me while I vomit…and then keep watching because I still like the rest of the movie.

Liking problematic things doesn’t make you an asshole. In fact, you can like really problematic things and still be not only a good person, but a good social justice activist (TM)! After all, most texts have some problematic elements in them, because they’re produced by humans, who are well-known to be imperfect. But it can be surprisingly difficult to own up to the problematic things in the media you like, particularly when you feel strongly about it, as many fans do. We need to find a way to enjoy the media we like without hurting other people and marginalised groups. So with that in mind, here are my suggestions for things we should try our darnedest to do as self-confessed fans of problematic stuff.

• Firstly, acknowledge that the thing you like is problematic and do not attempt to make excuses for it. It is a unique irritation to encounter a person who point blank refuses to admit that something they like is problematic. Infuriatingly, people will often actually articulate some version of the argument “It can’t be problematic because I like it, and I’m nice.” Alternatively, some fans may find it tempting to argue “Well this media is a realistic portrayal of societies like X, Y, Z”. But when you say that sexism and racism and heterosexism and cissexism have to be in the narrative or the story won’t be realistic, what you are saying is that we humans literally cannot recognise ourselves without systemic prejudice, nor can we connect to characters who are not unrepentant bigots. Um, yikes. YIKES, you guys.
  
  And even if you think that’s true (which scares the hell out of me), I don’t see you arguing for an accurate portrayal of everything in your fiction all the time. For example, most people seem fine without accurate portrayal of what personal hygiene was really like in 1300 CE in their medieval fantasy media. (Newsflash: realistically, Robb Stark and Jon Snow rarely bathed or brushed their teeth or hair). In real life, people have to go to the bathroom. In movies and books, they don’t show that very much, because it’s boring and gross. Well, guess what: bigotry is also boring and gross. But everyone is just dying to keep that in the script.
  
  Especially do not ever suggest that people not take media “so seriously,” or argue that it’s “just” a tv show. The narratives that we surround ourselves with can subtly, subconsciously influence how we think about ourselves and others. That’s why creating imaginary fantasy and sci fi worlds that have more equal societies can be a powerful thing for marginalised people, who mainstream media rarely acknowledges as heroes. But even if you don’t think that media matters, there is still no reason to focus exclusively on unequal or problematic fictional worlds and narratives. If it doesn’t matter, why don’t YOU stop taking your media so seriously and stop fighting us on this? You with your constant demands for your narrow idea of “realism” (which by the way often sounds a lot like “show me naked skinny ciswomen, and gore”). If in your framework tv shows aren’t serious business, why does realism matter? Why can’t you accept that it would be totally cool to have AT LEAST ONE BIG MEDIEVAL FANTASY EPIC WHERE WOMEN AND POC WERE LIKE, EQUAL TO WHITE MEN AND STUFF. STOP TAKING IT SO SERIOUSLY.

• Secondly, do not gloss over the issues or derail conversations about the problematic elements. Okay, so you can admit that Dune is problematic. But wait, you’re not done! You need to be willing to engage with people about it! It’s not enough to be like “Ok, I admit that it’s problematic that the major villain is a fat homosexual rapist, but come on, let’s focus on the giant sandworms!” Shutting people down, ignoring or giving minimal treatment to their concerns, and refusing to fully engage with their issues is a form of oppression. Implicitly, you’re giving the message that this person’s feelings are less important than your own. In fact, in this case you’re saying that their pain is less important than your enjoyment of a book, movie or tv show. So when people raise these concerns, listen respectfully and try to understand the views. Do not change the topic.

• Thirdly you must acknowledge other, even less favourable, interpretations of the media you like. Sometimes you still enjoy a movie or book because you read a certain, potentially problematic scene in a certain way – but others read it entirely differently, and found it more problematic. For example, consider the scene in Game of Thrones where Drogo rapes Dany (which he does not do in the books). One of my friends feels that it was portrayed like rape fetish porn, sexualising the act and Dany’s pain. But I feel that the scene focuses on Dany’s pain and tears in a manner that is not fetishising them (though even so the narrative is still totally fucked up because Dany and her rapist then go on to have a good, sexyfuntimes relationship…uh, no, HBO). I don’t agree with my friend’s interpretation but I recognise it as a totally valid reading of the scene.
  
  Also, as a fan of problematic media, you need to respect the fact that others may be so upset or angered by media you love that they don’t want to engage with it at all. In fact, one of my best friends won’t watch HBO’s Game of Thrones because of the racism and misogyny. That’s a completely legitimate and valid response to that tv show, and me trying to convince her to give it another shot would be disrespectful and hurtful. If you badger others to see what you see in something when they are telling you it’s not enjoyable for them, you’re being an entitled jerk. You’re showing yourself to be willing to hurt a real person over a television show. That really is a sign you’re taking things too seriously.

As fans, sometimes we need to remember that the things we like don’t define our worth as people. So there’s no need to defend them from every single criticism or pretend they are perfect. Really loving something means seeing it as it really is, not as you wish it were. You can still be a good fan while acknowledging the problematic elements of the things you love. In fact, that’s the only way to be a good fan of problematic things.

* Emphasis mine

How to be a fan of problematic things

Social Justice League:

I like things, and some of those things are problematic. I like Lord of the Rings even though it’s pretty fucked up with regard to women and race (any narrative that says “this whole race is evil” is fucked up, okay). I like A Song of Ice and Fire even though its portrayal of people of colour is problematic, and often I find that its in-text condemnation of patriarchy isn’t obvious enough to justify the sexism displayed. I like the movie Scott Pilgrim vs The World even though it is racist in its portrayal of Matthew Patel, panders to stereotypes in its portrayal of Wallace, and trivialises queer female sexuality in its portrayal of Ramona and Roxy’s relationship. For fuck’s sake, Ramona even says “It was a phase”! How much more cliche and offensive could this movie be? Oh wait, remember how Scott defeats Roxy, his only female adversary, by making her orgasm? Excuse me while I vomit…and then keep watching because I still like the rest of the movie.

Liking problematic things doesn’t make you an asshole. In fact, you can like really problematic things and still be not only a good person, but a good social justice activist (TM)! After all, most texts have some problematic elements in them, because they’re produced by humans, who are well-known to be imperfect. But it can be surprisingly difficult to own up to the problematic things in the media you like, particularly when you feel strongly about it, as many fans do. We need to find a way to enjoy the media we like without hurting other people and marginalised groups. So with that in mind, here are my suggestions for things we should try our darnedest to do as self-confessed fans of problematic stuff.

• Firstly, acknowledge that the thing you like is problematic and do not attempt to make excuses for it. It is a unique irritation to encounter a person who point blank refuses to admit that something they like is problematic. Infuriatingly, people will often actually articulate some version of the argument “It can’t be problematic because I like it, and I’m nice.” Alternatively, some fans may find it tempting to argue “Well this media is a realistic portrayal of societies like X, Y, Z”. But when you say that sexism and racism and heterosexism and cissexism have to be in the narrative or the story won’t be realistic, what you are saying is that we humans literally cannot recognise ourselves without systemic prejudice, nor can we connect to characters who are not unrepentant bigots. Um, yikes. YIKES, you guys.
  
  And even if you think that’s true (which scares the hell out of me), I don’t see you arguing for an accurate portrayal of everything in your fiction all the time. For example, most people seem fine without accurate portrayal of what personal hygiene was really like in 1300 CE in their medieval fantasy media. (Newsflash: realistically, Robb Stark and Jon Snow rarely bathed or brushed their teeth or hair). In real life, people have to go to the bathroom. In movies and books, they don’t show that very much, because it’s boring and gross. Well, guess what: bigotry is also boring and gross. But everyone is just dying to keep that in the script.
  
  Especially do not ever suggest that people not take media “so seriously,” or argue that it’s “just” a tv show. The narratives that we surround ourselves with can subtly, subconsciously influence how we think about ourselves and others. That’s why creating imaginary fantasy and sci fi worlds that have more equal societies can be a powerful thing for marginalised people, who mainstream media rarely acknowledges as heroes. But even if you don’t think that media matters, there is still no reason to focus exclusively on unequal or problematic fictional worlds and narratives. If it doesn’t matter, why don’t YOU stop taking your media so seriously and stop fighting us on this? You with your constant demands for your narrow idea of “realism” (which by the way often sounds a lot like “show me naked skinny ciswomen, and gore”). If in your framework tv shows aren’t serious business, why does realism matter? Why can’t you accept that it would be totally cool to have AT LEAST ONE BIG MEDIEVAL FANTASY EPIC WHERE WOMEN AND POC WERE LIKE, EQUAL TO WHITE MEN AND STUFF. STOP TAKING IT SO SERIOUSLY.

• Secondly, do not gloss over the issues or derail conversations about the problematic elements. Okay, so you can admit that Dune is problematic. But wait, you’re not done! You need to be willing to engage with people about it! It’s not enough to be like “Ok, I admit that it’s problematic that the major villain is a fat homosexual rapist, but come on, let’s focus on the giant sandworms!” Shutting people down, ignoring or giving minimal treatment to their concerns, and refusing to fully engage with their issues is a form of oppression. Implicitly, you’re giving the message that this person’s feelings are less important than your own. In fact, in this case you’re saying that their pain is less important than your enjoyment of a book, movie or tv show. So when people raise these concerns, listen respectfully and try to understand the views. Do not change the topic.

• Thirdly you must acknowledge other, even less favourable, interpretations of the media you like. Sometimes you still enjoy a movie or book because you read a certain, potentially problematic scene in a certain way – but others read it entirely differently, and found it more problematic. For example, consider the scene in Game of Thrones where Drogo rapes Dany (which he does not do in the books). One of my friends feels that it was portrayed like rape fetish porn, sexualising the act and Dany’s pain. But I feel that the scene focuses on Dany’s pain and tears in a manner that is not fetishising them (though even so the narrative is still totally fucked up because Dany and her rapist then go on to have a good, sexyfuntimes relationship…uh, no, HBO). I don’t agree with my friend’s interpretation but I recognise it as a totally valid reading of the scene.
  
  Also, as a fan of problematic media, you need to respect the fact that others may be so upset or angered by media you love that they don’t want to engage with it at all. In fact, one of my best friends won’t watch HBO’s Game of Thrones because of the racism and misogyny. That’s a completely legitimate and valid response to that tv show, and me trying to convince her to give it another shot would be disrespectful and hurtful. If you badger others to see what you see in something when they are telling you it’s not enjoyable for them, you’re being an entitled jerk. You’re showing yourself to be willing to hurt a real person over a television show. That really is a sign you’re taking things too seriously.

As fans, sometimes we need to remember that the things we like don’t define our worth as people. So there’s no need to defend them from every single criticism or pretend they are perfect. Really loving something means seeing it as it really is, not as you wish it were. You can still be a good fan while acknowledging the problematic elements of the things you love. In fact, that’s the only way to be a good fan of problematic things.

* Emphasis mine

I think I’m the only person who doesn’t really understand why Tessa not agreeing to date Will is supposed to be more heartbreaking than the fact that Jem is swiftly DYING.

Characters whom it MOST annoys me when they’re whitewashed in fancasts:

• Jem Carstairs
• Cassel Sharpe
• Carter Kane
• Magnus Bane
• Leo Valdez
• Piper McLean
• Tina Hakim-Baba

alohomorashlie:theparallelpersona:alohomorashlie:

Your posting of her art has gotten me surfing her Deviantart like a stalker. I LOVE this one. Sophie and Tessa in that moment. 

I APPEAR TO HAVE RATHER INFECTIOUS CAPABILITIES, DON’T I? XD

BUT I’M SO GLAD YOU’RE LOOKING. She has AMAZING art - emcarstairs is right. I can only DREAM of ever drawing HALF as nicely as her. Everything I do is so flat and BLAH and there’s all this personality in hers.

Ugh. Sophie and Tessa, so cute. <3

I LOVE THE STANCES OF GIDEON AND GABRIEL, TOO. They look so NATURAL, not stiff at all!

*INFERNAL DEVICES SPOILERS* THEORY TIME:

will-herondale:

I have no idea if anyone has thought of this theory but I haven’t seen it anywhere, so I am going to assume they haven’t and write it out regardless. My mom is reading Clockwork Prince right now and she called me tonight and brought this to my attention. Let me know what you think, haha :)

The idea is that Tessa’s mother was born a shadowhunter—Aloysius Starkweather’s granddaughter to be precise—and was swapped at birth with a faerie changling who was sick. Tessa’s mother was then raised in the fae world and the faerie girl who was presumed to be the Starkweather died young. 

Reasons/Evidence/Nonsense:

-Will and Tessa see the painting of Adele Starkweather, and her description “Her face was thin and pale and sickly, but her eyes were bright—the only bright thing in this dark place, Tessa had thought.”

-When Adele got her runes when she was ten years old, something went wrong and she ended up going insane and dying. It makes sense if there was iron in the stele and when they used it on her it killed her because she was a faerie and that is one of their weaknesses.

-When Starkweather saw Tessa for the first time, he reacted almost like he recognized her. Later Hyacinth says “You must be Tessa Gray…You look just like your mother”, so it would make sense if he was taken aback by seeing Tessa if he knew her mother or someone who looked like her mother (i.e. his daughter, who if this were true would be Tessa’s grandmother). He was going to just dismiss Will and Jem but when he saw Tessa he decided to let them stay and to help them. I’m guessing he knows about the swap since they probably figured it out when Adele was dying or after she died. That’s why he was so shocked to see Tessa and why he was curious enough about her to let them in.

-Hyacinth: “Sometimes when our faerie blood has grown weak and thin, we will find our way into a human home, and take the best, the prettiest, and the plumpest child—and, quick as a wink, replace the babe with a sickly one of our own. While the human child grows tall and strong in our lands, the human family will find itself burdened with a dying creature fearful of cold iron. Our bloodline is strengthened—” Why would she bring this up to Tessa if not to hint at something. Obviously Tessa thought she was hinting that Tessa could be a changling, but Tessa didn’t really think too hard on the fact that Hyacinth knew her mother. They probably grew up together.

fyabooks:

The Infernal Devices Dreamcast: Olivia Wilde as Camille Belcourt

The room exploded in a hubbub. Will leaped from his chair and was dancing in a circle. Tessa stayed where she was, stunned, and Jem remained beside her. Meanwhile, Will appeared to be singing a song about how he had been right about demon pox all along.
Will: "Demon pox, oh, demon pox, Just how is it acquired? One must go down to the bad part of town Until one is very tired. Demon pox, oh, demon pox I had it all along - No, not the pox, you foolish blocks, I mean this very song - For I was right, and you were wrong!"
Charlotte: "Will! Have you LOST YOUR MIND? CEASE THAT INFERNAL RACKET! Jem--"
Jem, rising to his feet, clapped his hands over Will's mouth. "Do you promise to be quiet?" he hissed into his friend's ear.
WIll nodded, blue eyes blazing. Tessa was staring at him in amazement; they all were. She had seen Will many things -- amused, bitter, condescending, angry, pitying -- but never giddy before.
Jem let him go. "All right, then."
Will slid to the floor, his back against the armchair, and threw his arms up. "A demon pox in all your houses!" he announced, and yawned.
Jem: "Oh God, weeks of pox jokes. We're in for it now."

Jem WANTS Tessa but Will NEEDS her.

Lollo

(so sorry all Jem fans, but it’s the truth!)

TRUTH

(via tessherondale)

And that’s emotional abuse and NOT a healthy relationship dynamic! ::Jazz hands::  Being obligated to feel or stay in a relationship with someone because of dependency is dangerous and unhealthy.  There’s been a ton of discussion about this already.

(Source: thebrighterburningstar)

TID fanfic recs

steles:

OKAY. so the other night i went begging to alohomorashlie for a jem/tessa rec list and she was awesome enough to put something together. i would like to recommend that list:

JEM/TESSA FANFIC RECS

along with some other TID stories:

Fragments (jem/tessa)
may these memories break our fall (will, jem)
Coincidences (will/tessa)
Fifteen Drabbles for Fifteen Pairings: TID (multiple)
Headgames (jem/tessa)
The Right Man (jem/tessa)
How the Heavens Go: An Unlikely Story (gabriel/tessa)

i will try to update this list periodically with more fics. :)

Oh, thank you! <3

I have some TID recs in my Massive Fic Rec Post Of Every Fandom I Am In, as well.  The ones by igrab are particularly lovely!

(Source: mellarks)

shadowhunter-quotes:

He went on determinedly. “To tell you of my feelings first before I showed them. To write poetry for you-“

“You don’t even like poetry,” Tessa said, her voice catching, a half laugh of relief.

“No. But you make me want to write it. Does that not count for anything?”

-Jem and Tessa, Clockwork Prince

theherondaleboys:

‘There are always some men like that - just one woman for them, and only she will do, or nothing.’

Random TMI/TID headcannons… leading into T/S shippy thoughts.

angel-gidget:

1. Magnus steeled his heart against falling in love with Will because he knew he was his type and knew he was trouble.

2.  It did no good because he still ended up loving Will and, even platonically, the shadowhunter was able to rip at his heart.

3. Part of Will really did believe that when when it came to magic, Magnus could do anything.

4. Henry and Charlotte’s parents were so obsessed with the business deal end of their children’s marriage, it never occurred to them to assure their children that one really did want to marry the other.

5. Jace experienced confusingly equal levels of amusement and sexual frustration whenever Clary chose drawing and daydreaming over making out.

6. Just because Simon could change the nature of his love for Clary back to that of friendship, didn’t change the fact that outliving Clary was still the absolutely most terrifying part of immortality to him.

7. When Tessa finally brought herself to visit the New York Institute, she said her polite introductions, but then simply froze upon seeing Church… just calmly curled up in a corner. She rushed forward and fell to her knees hugging the wriggling cat because he had been Jem’s and he was still alive after all this time… and it’s not as if Magnus wouldn’t be dear and explain away her tears to the others anyhow.

8. Jace would sometimes wake up and literally wonder which name he’d decided to go by that week.

9. Alec remembered not feeling any obvious sensation upon first wearing the fearless rune… but there was definitely a difference between when it was working and when it wasn’t. And he was often tempted to ask Clary to mark him with it again.

10. Isabelle once broke her 7-inches motto for ballet flats. Clary looked so cute in them, and Izzy just wondered if she could pull it off too… but she never told anyone.

11. One of Simon’s older cult-film obsessions was the 60’s British TV show “The Avengers”. He always liked the way the respectful gentleman Mr. Steed had a deep, subtle, and respectful flirtation with the beautiful young widow Mrs. Peel.

12. It affected the way he called Tessa “Mrs. Carstairs,” with a certain fanciful yet tongue-in-cheek attraction and respect.

13. Tessa actually liked the way he said it so much, that she waited several years before really insisting that he call her by her first name. They *were* dating, after all, and it *was* the twenty-second century.

14. Simon worried about Magnus feeling left out, since the three of them had been a trio for some time… but Magnus sincerely wished him and Tessa the best of luck.

15. But Magnus couldn’t stand to get involved with fellow immortals anymore. Loving mortals inevitably hurt because they *had* to leave you. But loving immortals was worse when they *chose* to leave you.

16. One Christmas, Simon and Tessa decided to play secret-santa to Clary and Jace’s many-great grandchildren. They were both on a nostalgia kick, with Simon remembering Clary and Jace and Tessa remembering Will.

17. Despite both being consummate readers and devours of stories, Simon and Tessa couldn’t help nit-picking at each other’s taste. As far as Tessa was concerned, if Simon liked science fiction so much, he should pick up  some Jules Verne. And Simon thought that if Tessa was really open to an infinite variety of tales as she claimed, than the reputation of “The Call of Cthulu” shouldn’t deter her.

18. Some days Tessa would still miss Jem so badly it would shake her down to her core, long after his body was dust and shadows. Even after she’d grown into a different person entirely.

19. But she was still so grateful he’d loved her the same way back, because she knew Simon hadn’t had even that, and the only person he missed that way was Clary.

20. Church watched everything with the same indifferent laziness that cats—even immortal ones—do. At at the end of everything, he outlived them all.